Talk-It-Over

Talking through the message during the week helps you turn what God is saying into action steps. These talking points, questions, and scriptures are designed to help you take the next step. If you are leading a group through this guide, don’t feel like you have to answer every question. Pick out those questions that will stir up conversation and action among your group. 

God With Us In Our Skin

Matthew 1:18-23

18 The birth of Jesus Christ came about this way: After his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, it was discovered before they came together that she was pregnant from the Holy Spirit. 19 So her husband, Joseph, being a righteous man, and not wanting to disgrace her publicly, decided to divorce her secretly. 20 But after he had considered these things, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, saying, “Joseph, son of David, don’t be afraid to take Mary as your wife, because what has been conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will give birth to a son, and you are to name him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” 22 Now all this took place to fulfill what was spoken by the Lord through the prophet: 23 See, the virgin will become pregnant and give birth to a son, and they will name him Immanuel, which is translated “God is with us.”

① Jesus emptied himself : God came down.

(Philippians 2:6–8) … [Jesus] who, existing in the form of God [the very essence—morphé—of God], did not consider equality with God as something to be exploited [or ‘held onto’; something to be leveraged]. Instead he emptied himself by assuming the form of a servant …

DISCUSS this quote. How do you see it in today’s world (or do you)?: There are 2 FALSE ideas which constantly challenge our understanding of Christ. One is to humanize Jesus to the degree that his divinity is lost. The other is to divinize Jesus to the degree that his humanity is lost.

② Jesus took our flesh : God came down as a man.

We know Jesus had emotions (He wept), that he got hungry (He ate), that He got tired (He went away to rest), was tempted, and that He suffered in the flesh. 

DISCUSS how the humanity of Jesus relates to, and should guide us in our human experiences. (Note Hebrews 4:14-15)

③ Jesus became sin for us : God came down as a man to redeem humanity.

Jesus had a mission. He was born to die for us, to save us from our sin. 

DISCUSS the “Scarlet Thread” that runs from Genesis to Revelation.

Next Steps

1— I will believe that Jesus is Emmanuel, God with us and trust in Him alone to save me from my sins.

2— I will trust that as Emmanuel, Jesus understands my experiences of life—my pain, my struggles, my temptations—and I will look to Him for help believing that He is with me, in me, and for me.

3—I will offer my body as a living sacrifice to God, choosing to deny myself, take up my cross, and following Christ wherever He leads me.

• How can we pray for you?

Small Group Guidelines

Though we call these Basic Group Guidelines, these are also effective in all relationships and environments. We believe it is wise to observe these whether in a one-on-one conversation or in a group discussion.

• Guidelines give boundaries for people to operate within.

• They help with the flow and pace of the discussions.

• They help us value one another.

• They help people to be more comfortable sharing deep and meaningful things.

This is a Safe Group

Confidentiality is key, what is said in the group stays in the group. Be aware how you are affecting the environment: words, actions, and non-verbal communication. This needs to be a place where people feel comfortable opening up and sharing.

No Crosstalk

Be considerate of others as they are sharing. No side conversations, checking phone, responding to text or email, etc.

Listen

Let’s value one another by listening to what is being shared. Allow a pause after someone shares to allow them to finish and others to consider what was said. Eye contact and body posture play key roles in creating a positive or negative group environment.

No Rescuing or Fixing

We are not here to fix each other, Jesus does that part. Avoid the tendency to rescue when someone is struggling to get the words out or shares a struggle or conviction.

Use “I” Statements

It’s easy to talk about the issues of others or respond with “we”, “us”, “the church”. But for us to grow as disciples and build relationship we want to use “I” statements.

Don’t Overtalk

We want to create time for all members of the group to participate in the discussion. Be careful not to always be the first responder or regularly give long responses.

Fight for Relationship

It’s not “if” conflict or hurt feelings will happen, but “when”. We commit to fight for relationship with each other. Go to that person and share your struggle or seek wise advice if you are not sure how to handle the conflict.